The Lower Quote, As If You Didn't Know, Is By Richard Dawkins, Son.

Thursday, December 01, 2005

"Intelligent" Design

As someone who doesn't believe in religion in any capacity, it boggles my mind to think that grown adults all over the world would happily kill me because of my atheistic heathenism in the name of their "loving religion." That cracks me up for days. Kansas' recent decision to put "Intelligent" Design in science classrooms to "tell the students both sides of the story" saddens me for those kids. Seriously, is this how it will be there?

ID version of a year in a Kansas biology class:

"Hi kids, welcome to biology 101. Today we're going to learn where life on Earth came from. Because of the court order I have to say something about the 'theory' of evolution, so here goes. Some weirdo hell-dwelling Satan lover came up with this ludicrous idea that we came from monkeys. You can pretty much throw this silly theory away based solely on that. Ok, so on to a really good idea...

"With Intelligent Design, we study until it gets too hard, then we say 'God did it'. That's it. If any exam question is too hard for you to answer, just write 'God did this' and you'll be given a perfect score. If your textbook is too difficult, read your bible. Actually, if you all 'lost' your textbooks, that'd be ok, as long as you read your bible.

"Ok, see you all at the final."

If that's not crazy, I don't know what is. Yeah, there's an invisible guy in the sky who does everything we don't understand...and everything else we think we understand. Actually, we don't know anything and God does it all. Sorry, the "intelligent designer" does it all. But the designer is an American, not one of those weirdy false gods...sorry, designers, from one of those loser countries. The "intelligent designer is certainly not Allah, Vishnu, or Thor. Not Posiden, Ganesh, or Buddha. It's the good ol' American boy, Jesus and his father.

I'd like a poll done asking, "Where was Jesus from?" and see how many people say "Manhatten".