Jesus Hates Wal-Mart
You must go here http://abcnews.go.com/Business/wireStory?id=1387569 and read the article first. Then you must go to the emergency eye-wash station you should have set up next to your keyboard and rinse for 8 minutes, minimum. That should fix you right up.
Some people are now saying with confidence where Jesus would shop. Well, if my history is at all accurate, he probably shopped in huts. Huts that sold mud, dirt, the odd fish, and maybe some maize. Actually, not maize; more likely dates or figs. Last I checked, his 'hood back when he was walking around (and not everyone is convinced that he did walk around - see http://www.thegodmovie.com/index.php) didn't have very high sales of DVDs or sneakers with wheels in the heel. Let's not go jumping to conclusions about what some magician from 2000 years ago would purchase. K? K.
Also, these helmeted short-bus riders (http://www.leftbehind.com/channelendtimes.asp?pageid=1243&
channelID=71) seem to think that the signs of the end of the world are not quite here yet, but they're coming. I think the resurgence of Billy Ray Cyrus' career on that TV show should be one of those horsemen. It boggles my mind every day that people are seriously talking about how the world is going to end and referencing the damn bible.
I'm officially out. You people can believe what you want, I'm going to make myself a crunchy peanut butter sandwich on white bread and eat it with a glass of milk. There's probably a verse or two in the damn bible that tells me that I shouldn't do that, but, in the words of Socrates, "Fuck 'em."