The Lower Quote, As If You Didn't Know, Is By Richard Dawkins, Son.

Friday, May 19, 2006

GTA: The Rapture - Steal a Smart Car and a Case of Wine

I don't want to talk about The DaVinci Code. Saying that should excuse me for bringing it up to talk about a separate issue found in a recent newspaper article in the Toronto Star.

A group calling itself Campus Crusade for Christ is taking up the torch to educate people about the fictitious nature of Dan Brown's book/movie. They seem to be quite serious and have volunteers ready to hand out flyers to moviegoers as they stand in line, flyers with biblical verses on them showing that Jesus could not have married Mary Magdalene. Don't bother taking one though because once you get into the theatre, the group has spent $63,000 to make a 10 second commercial that will run in the credits before the movie.

You read that correctly: sixty-three thousand dollars for 10 seconds. That kind of coin would buy a lot of cans of soup for Food Banks.

(As an update, Cineplex Odeon has apparently pulled the spots because they were "too controversial". I didn't think the ad was in any way controversial, but when I go to the movies, I don't want to see an ad for Toyota let alone some church group telling me to "discuss" DaVinci. You can see the 10 second spot here.)

Churches are trying to market themselves now. They've shifted in their focus and are trying, some would say in vain, to keep up with the times. In the article I read, one church has come out with its own brand of wines - a cabernet, chardonnay, and a zinfandel. I guess if you had to drink "the blood of Christ" (and how creepy is that!?) every day, you'd at least want it to not taste like...well...blood.

Not to be outdone, the psycho, fear-mongering folks behind the Left Behind movement have come out with a video game called, Left Behind: Eternal Forces, which puts the player in the Rapture (oddly announced on their page as happening in 17 days on June 6, 2006 - 06/06/06 - which seems like the number sixty thousand six hundred six rather than their beastly six hundred sixty six). Maybe I'm wrong.

They describe the gunplay and battles in the game as "'Star Wars' violence", which they think the parents will be ok with. Guys, Christian parents took their kids to see The Passion for fuck's sake. That was a guy getting his ass kicked hard for three hours - I'm sure religious parents will be cool with shooting and killing us left behind non-believers and the ominous anti-christ.

When archaic institutions like churches and cathedrals try to keep up with the times, they seem as if they're either pandering to people ("Look, it's Christ Clear! Just like the old Christ, only with 0 calories and no trans fats!") or like they're changing their minds about what's important ("We can have a violent video game! Violence is ok as long as it's not directed at us godly folks! See, we're hip!"). It's understandable that they will try to keep their ideas alive, but it is sad to watch the death throes.

9 Barbaric Yawps:

At 19/5/06 11:04 am, Anonymous Paul said...

It's funny. They want to "discuss DaVinci," but if we wanted to "discuss" the bible, they wouldn't be so eager.

At 19/5/06 2:08 pm, Blogger Secret Rapture said...

My inaugural address at the Great White Throne Judgment of the Dead, after I have raptured out billions!

Read My Inaugural Address Online
My Site =
Your jaw will drop!

At 19/5/06 2:14 pm, Anonymous rob said...

Paul, I'm not sure I understand your point. We discuss the Bible quite often. Was there something you wanted to discuss about it?

At 19/5/06 7:08 pm, Blogger BigHeathenMike said...

Hey Rob,
First of all, thanks for stopping by to read my stuff. Now, not to put words in Paul's mouth, but I think he's using the word "discuss" to mean "examine and look at objectively". It has been our experience (well, my experience anyway) that most people seem outwardly open to "discussions" about the bible, but when tough questions arise, the "discussion" falls apart and the bible-believer falls into tired old "arguments" about "this is a metaphor, but that's to be taken literally", and the like.

And the idea that people have to be "saved" from something is just silly. It's like we're watching a bunch of kids playing monsters and we walk through the grass - only to the kids it's not grass, it's a swamp filled with huge snakes. They feel that they have to tell us about the moat-snakes and save us from the horrible fate of being eaten alive. We, however, don't believe in the moat-snakes and are taking no part in their game. We don't need to be saved, thanks anyways.

That's how we see religion. You want to "save" us from this horrible place called "Hell". We don't believe in this place because the idea of it is...what's the term..."fuckin' retarded".

Enjoy your day.

At 19/5/06 8:29 pm, Anonymous rob said...

Thanks, bigheathenmike, for sharing at least where you're coming from. I get where you're coming from. I, for one, don't mind actually discussing it. I'll be the first to admit there's stuff about Christianity I don't get or that frustrate me. Guess that's what the deal with faith is.

Don't worry. I'm not here to "save" anyone. I just saw y'all were talking about us so I thought I'd stop by and see what the deal was.

If you want to discuss stuff, let me know. I can kinda guess you feel you've said your piece and that's good enough. You know how to find me. Have a great weekend.

At 19/5/06 8:54 pm, Blogger BigHeathenMike said...

Coolness, friend. I'll certainly be by if/when I have questions for you or just to have a chat. We'll be here if you have any questions about what's up in this neck of the woods.

Have a good one.

At 21/5/06 7:18 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm no expert on the rapture but I have to ask. If the rapture is going to occur on 06/06/06 time why is bothering to sell books and other products? Surely they can't take the money with them?

At 21/5/06 8:38 pm, Blogger BigHeathenMike said...

Yeah, there's faith in action, eh? I'm sure in their purple-sky-world they can take their money to "heaven" and buy top-of-the-line wings and shit.

At 23/5/06 3:11 pm, Anonymous Sean Kehoe said...

rYou can take your money to heaven but the exchange rate is terrible. Don't change your money when you see ST Paul, wait until you're inside. There's a little shop just inside the entrance that'll give you a decent rate.

BTW, regards the idea of trying to make money when the rapture is coming... Have you seen this?

It's an amusing article asking why Christians bother with things like insurance?

It reminds me of a chap I used to know. He was the most devout Christian I have ever known. He was a classic young-Earth creationist Christian fundamentalist. One day though he came in to work shaken. He'd gotten a lift from someone widely known to be the worst driver in Europe. He claimed he nearly had a heart attack because the driving was so bad. I asked him why he was scared since if he died, he'd be sitting next to Jesus within a couple of hours. He didn't have much of an answer.


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