The Lower Quote, As If You Didn't Know, Is By Richard Dawkins, Son.

Saturday, September 09, 2006

The List

There's nothing I care about today. The last couple of days sifting through the news has been filled with either "Meh, who cares", "Fuck, that's stupid to the point of not being worth commenting on", and "That's great, but not interesting".

Under "Meh", we have Tony Blair's party collapsing, Bush and his party still fucking up left and right, and Stephen Harper doing what he does to be an annoying little prat.

Under "Fuck that's stupid", we have Paris Hilton's DUI arrest, Lindsay Lohan's loss and subesquent regaining of a million dollars worth of jewels she left in a fucking handbag, and Tucker Carlson on Dancing With the Stars (implying that he's a fuckin' star...whatever).

Finally, under "Great but Uninteresting", we have the Space Shuttle Atlantis launch, the tribute of Khaki Friday in Australia to Steve Irwin, and there is still no link betweek Saddam/Iraq and Al Quesadea.

I'm just bored with the whole situation. It's like the retarded kids I used to work with; you'd leave for a year or two, go back and there'd be no change at all. They'd be older and bigger, but there was absolutely no behavioral changes whatsoever. That's us - that's humans. We might as well all be drooling retards who never learn. I think I have to move somewhere where I can just be an outdoorsy fella and fish and maybe be a guide or something. Forget about people who believe in ghosts and psychics and reiki; put behind me the chelation and chiropractic and acupuncture; leave for dead the "celebrity" red string around the wrist and incessant worship of ignorance we seem to be so quick to succumb to.

In honor of George Carlin, I too am going to give to you a list (much like Carlin did in his Complaints and Grievances special) of People Who Should Be Killed - in no particular order and by no means all-inclusive...feel free to add to it:
Deepak Chopra
Sharon Stone
Paris Hilton
John Edward
Sylvia Browne
James VanPraagh
Rosemary Altea
Ted Haggard
Benny Hinn
Peter Popoff
Uri Geller
Alison DuBois
Montel Williams
Geraldo Rivera
Bill O'Reilly
Everyone in the "Westboro Baptist Church", especially Fred Phelps
Osama Bin Laden
Jerry Falwell
Pat Robertson
Too many politicians to name
The fucking Pope

I am by no means advocating that anyone harm or otherwise do damage to these people, I just wouldn't be in any way emotionally distraught by their demise. As I said above, feel free to add to the list.

6 Barbaric Yawps:

At 10/9/06 1:43 pm, Anonymous ATM said...

What about Tim Lahaye and Jerry Jenkins? They would make excellent additions to the list.

At 10/9/06 3:01 pm, Blogger BigHeathenMike said...

Those guys are DEFINITELY on the list.

At 12/9/06 10:12 am, Anonymous Anonymous said...

You forgot Ann Coulter. That cunt's GOT to go.

At 12/9/06 2:46 pm, Blogger BigHeathenMike said...

Holy fuck, how did I miss HER?! I think I just blotted her from my mind as a survival instinct. Thanks, she certainly does belong up there.

At 12/9/06 9:27 pm, Anonymous Babbler said...

Almost anybody how write a dumb political rant/self-help book, and is conceited enough to put their usually ugly mug on the cover. For example, Dr. Phil.

Your just make self a more indefinable target.

At 13/9/06 12:12 pm, Anonymous modusoperandi said...

Don't forget the boneheads on the left: Al Franken, the militant arm of Greenpeace, any hippie prick that "saves" trees by camping in one (leaving his/her garbage and shit scattered around the trunk), and anyone who says "You shouldn't do that for a living" without providing an alternative.

Anyone even vaguely connected with "battlecry".

People that think "Reefer Madness" was a documentary.

People that think "The Flinstones" was a documentary and want to teach your kids that it was.

Anyone who's "chosen". I don't care which religion. Having god on your side inevitably leads to you being a prick.

Also, any politico that thinks he/she needs to "stand up for the children".


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