The Lower Quote, As If You Didn't Know, Is By Richard Dawkins, Son.

Sunday, October 22, 2006

Good Pets?

I'm watching TV today and on Spike there was a commercial for a show called When Good Pets Go Bad. Now, I'm all in favour of watching animals beat the living fuck out of people - I've gone on record in the past as saying there's nothing funnier than when wild animals tear into the flesh and bone of a giant dipshit.

That being said, the commerical has short clips of a cobra striking at the groin of a dude, a crocodile snapping its jaws shut on the head of some asshat, and a bull tossing a rider through the air like so many potatos in a sack. All very entertaining and, in my opinion, humerous bits; the problem is that none of these animals are good pets. It's a tad misleading in the advertising and in the name of the show. Cats, dogs, budgies...I'd even extend it to include ferrets, iguanas, and what the hell, llamas. If you happen to be the owner of a crocodile, however, and it decides one day to "go bad", let me let you in on a little secret that everyone else knows as something called "regular common sense": crocodiles, cobras, and bulls make shitty pets that don't "go bad", they just think you'd make like a Coffee Crisp - a nice light snack.

2 Barbaric Yawps:

At 23/10/06 3:52 pm, Anonymous ATM said...

Ah, crocodiles. People buy them when they're tiny and cute but flush 'em down the toilet when they get big...or they keep 'em and get their heads stuck in their mouths.

At 27/10/06 1:43 pm, Anonymous modusoperandi said...

It is Darwin in action...just as long as that Cobra bit that guy's crotch before he had managed to reproduce.


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