The Lower Quote, As If You Didn't Know, Is By Richard Dawkins, Son.

Sunday, April 01, 2007

In Which I Bait the Nutbag

So the dude who wrote me the annoying letter seemed to feel it necessary to continue the "conversation" and show his persistence. He sent me this lovely little follow-up (I didn't change a thing):
Greetings Mike
I felt some pain when I read your comments - BLOG. I imagine you were raging of your fear, pain & shame. I imagine you are a RAGEAHOLIC, CONTROL FREAK & AVOIDER - you have a conscious fear of intimacy & an unconscious fear of abandonment. I get a sense that you are a terrified 'little boy'!! You abandoned him (inner child) a long time ago. Get down on your knees, Mike, & ask Jesus to forgive you for your sins. I 'love' you, Mike & I will be praying for you.
Peace Be With You
Michael (Follower of Jesus Christ)
PS: How do you feel, Mike?

Fuck, where does a person start? Now I have to comment on an amature Sigmund Freud crossed with Corky from Life Goes On.

You "felt some pain". Well guess what? I felt pain when you initially contacted me, out of the blue, like a Jesus Wino asking for money while I'm on my way to the bank. Howzabout you leave random people who are just getting through their lives the fuck alone? Why don't we try that on for size? At the moment, you are a Jehovah's Witness, unwantedly knocking on my door to offer me retarded "spiritual" advice and then getting snitty when I tell you to go fuck yourself.

You assume I have "fear, pain & shame", am a "RAGEAHOLIC, CONTROL FREAK & AVOIDER", have fears of abandonment and intimacy, and am a "terrified little boy". Hm. If I had a control freak Man In The Sky (MITS), via some virgin dude in a robe, telling me that sex was bad, regardless of my natural impulses to procreate, that might make me have the first three of your accusations.

When I question hard-core believers, like you seem to be, about their supposed MITS and his silly rules and regulations, steadfastly refusing to be intimidated by the threats of hell, burning, isolation and whatnot, I generally receive rage, avoidance of facts or common sense, and a complete inability to give up control of the situation. Are you getting the feeling that ol' Mikey seems to be looking in a mirror?

I didn't "abandon" my "inner child". I grew up. Most of us move from childhood to adulthood and grow in our knowledge about the world around us. People like you feel the need for a constant Father Figure, your beloved MITS, thus keeping yourselves in a permanent stage of childhood, complete with a forgiving mechanism that allows you to escape responsibility for your actions. Ain't religion grand?! I don't have an "inner child", douchebag, and neither do you.

I get down on my knees for only a few reasons, none involving a possibly fictional character from 2000 years ago and his "love" for me...or yours. I have plenty of friends and family and a kick ass life far far away from weirdyasses like you. Feel free to pray for me; anything to keep you occupied with a pointless, meaningless activity so you won't bother anyone else is better than what's going on presently.

How do I "feel"? I feel like having breakfast, but my skin feels pretty soft and furry. I also feel like saying that you should preach to the converted because it's not flying here (although it's making for a couple of good posts in a slow week - so thanks for that).

12 Barbaric Yawps:

At 1/4/07 8:56 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...


At 1/4/07 11:36 pm, Blogger Atheist in a mini van. said...

Look at you! All growed' up and with your own fundy. :) I'm so proud.

At 2/4/07 1:07 am, Blogger EoR said...

How do you tell the difference between a schizophrenic diatribe, and a fundy proselytising?

This is not a rhetorical question. EoR can't tell whether your troll is the former or the latter. Or maybe both.


At 2/4/07 7:50 am, Blogger BigHeathenMike said...

Yeah. You really have to enjoy these times because they grow so fast. I mean, now they keep you up at night and whine and stuff, but later you'll realize how special these first few vitrolic emails and comments were.

And to question 2, I'm not sure either. I'd lean towards a young schizophrenic fundy attempting to proselytise. I think this person is in their late teens or early twenties.

At 2/4/07 8:17 am, Blogger chooseDoubt said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

At 2/4/07 8:24 am, Blogger chooseDoubt said...

What your fundy, and other fundies, need to do is go and read this, all of it, and then consider applying what they've read to every single "evidence" they have to justify their own beliefs. If after that they are still able to make a statement in support of their faith that doesn't fall foul of any of what they just learned then at least we could have an adult conversation with them. As it is they're just moronic but utterly incapable of seeing that since they never learned the skill of thinking.

In other words fundy, your pride in what you think you know can come before the fall of your blind ignorance, but that's up to you. Learn or stay stupid and oblivious to the real reasons why atheists think you're a ridiculous twat. If you go for staying stupid then keep it to yourself. We've heard it all before and we're genuinely shocked to keep hearing it from life forms allowed the responsibility to vote.

At 2/4/07 8:27 am, Blogger chooseDoubt said...

The link to read was this:

At 2/4/07 12:53 pm, Blogger Rev. BigDumbChimp said...

I suspect you'll hear more from our jesus crispy friend. These types don't get the message easily no matter how hot the branding iron is.

At 2/4/07 12:57 pm, Blogger Eamon Knight said...

Same guy seems to have left similar comments at Sandwalk and Thoughts in a Haystack, though under the name Patrick.

Definitely sounds clinical to me.

At 2/4/07 2:45 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nothing like a troll to lighten up your day! I hope he writes again :-) The best part about these guys is that their religeon is all based on fear and self-loathing, so they figure that's the best way to get to you. Break you down into a quivering little child, cowering in fear, and then give you their MITS to lift you above and promise everything will be ok. Unfortunately it will never work, because you aren't already living that fear based life like they are, and they cannot even comprehend such a thing. It's hard to even have a regular conversation with people like this, because their reality is not even close to ours. They do best in groups of their own kind, where their arguements might actually make sense.


At 2/4/07 3:08 pm, Blogger King Aardvark said...

He's probably right about the RAGEAHOLIC part ;-) Shame and pain, probably not so much. Congrats on the trolling. When you reach PZ-like levels and have to put up with nonsense like this on a daily basis, I'm sure it'll lose some of it's appeal but, for now, enjoy it while you can. It means you're doing something right.

At 6/4/07 10:36 am, Anonymous Anonymous said...


This website summarizes 300 United States court cases and lawsuits affecting children of Jehovah's Witnesses, including dozens of cases where the Parents refused to consent to life-saving blood transfusions:


This website summarizes 160 United States court cases and lawsuits filed by Jehovah's Witnesses against Employers:



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