The Lower Quote, As If You Didn't Know, Is By Richard Dawkins, Son.

Tuesday, January 08, 2008

Extra-Creepy Fuckalicious

Ok, seriously, what the fuck is wrong with Catholics? They want to exhume Padre Pio who died in 1968 so the freaks can pray over him and get their three wishes (or some other equally stupid shit).

For those who don't know, Padre Pio was:
a 20th century mystic monk said to have suffered from stigmata...was said to have wrestled with the devil in his monastery cell and also to have predicted future events...(and) was even said to have had the power to appear in two places at once.
So basically he was an amature magician who was like Jim Carrey in the bathroom scene of Liar Liar mixed with a bit of Arnold in Total Recall. Well worth the price of admission - dig homeboy up!

A weird little tidbit of the story is that:
A Catholic magazine once found far more Italian Catholics pray to him than any other icon of the faith, including the Virgin Mary or Jesus.
Wouldn't that constitute some sort of blasphemy or religious faux-pas? Shouldn't Jebus be the top dog, so to speak? Maybe I'm too strict in my lapsed Catholicism....

Of course there's people who don't want the former Francesco Forgione dug up and displayed like some holy aged meat product. Like his family, for instance. I hope they win their case because I can't think of anything more fucking creepy than displaying a 40-year old corpse so weepy dipshits can ask it for advice.

Think about that for a second; imagine that some people decided to dig up their dad 40 years after he died so they could display him in their living room at a family reunion. Would you think that was a sweet act allowing the rest of his kin the chance to "visit", or would you think they were a bunch of retarded gomers who were possibly insane? I lean towards the latter.

(hat tip to Stardust over at God is for Suckers for the link.)

7 Barbaric Yawps:

At 9/1/08 12:22 am, Blogger Paul said...

Heh, the Italians do like their relics. Just about every church you go into over there has a saint bone on display somewhere. It's all pretty macabre if you ask me.

I wrote a bit about Padre Pio a couple of years ago just after I visited Italy with my wife: Padre Pio...he's everywhere!

At 9/1/08 12:26 am, Blogger Protium said...

Stigmata my arse... he used carbolic acid to keep the wounds fresh.

At 9/1/08 1:53 am, Blogger Vamp said...

All I can say it WOW! He used carbolic acid? WOW! Sounds like he was a wacky kid - yeah, let's make him a priest....shit.

At 9/1/08 3:01 am, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hehehehe...Can I just tell you how much it tickles me that you used the word "funkalicious"? I feel like such a trend setter. ;)

At 9/1/08 7:01 am, Blogger BigHeathenMike said...

Although you certainly are a trend-setter, I used "extra-crispy fuckalicious" back in August.

But you have WAY more readers and are, by all accounts, a much much nicer person :) I hope you're feeling fab!

At 9/1/08 3:18 pm, Blogger salomedesade said...

I haven't visited your blog in a while, and I come in to see that the Catholics want to exhume a dead guy. Crazy, but keeping with the church's fascination with death. Catholicism is such a morbid religion, maybe that's why I turned into a goth chick who's obsessed with serial killers.

At 22/1/08 8:17 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

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