The Lower Quote, As If You Didn't Know, Is By Richard Dawkins, Son.

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Maybe a Genetic Cause for Autism

How much money do you want to bet that anti-vax douchebags Jenny McCarthy and her retarded boyfriend Jim Carrey won't ever mention this article in their little Kill the Children tours? I'd bet a lot.
Researchers have found that many people with autism share common genetic variations, a discovery that may improve diagnosis and offers the promise of developing treatments for the frustratingly mysterious disorder.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say that the treatments these folks are talking about have nothing to do with a "mommy instinct". Just a hunch. Check this out:
...most autistic people examined have a genetic variation in a portion of their DNA that affects the way brain cells connect with one another.... Both reports add weight to the idea that autism is related to problems with the way brain cells connect.
So it's not vaccines, then? No? Right. I love this bit:
Up to now, the medical community could say very little about what causes autism or how to treat it. The lack of scientific knowledge about autism has led to a proliferation of pseudoscientific explanations for the disorder, as well as unproven treatments. (my highlighting)
Psst...Jenny...he's talking to you...douchebag.

A 7th Day Adventist Wants To Play

Back in aught six I wrote a post about the Seventh Day Adventists who left one of their stupid booklets in my door. In that piece, I wrote this paragraph:
I could never be an SDA person because of the fact(s), namely: they hate gays - well, obviously; they don't drink (strike two); and they think "creation science" solves millions of years of evolutionary evidence. Gatdamn, I'd rather punch myself in the face for a year and a half than spend a minute in the presence of SDA weirdos in my home.
The other day, one of the believers stopped in to my site, found said article and was, shall we say, offended by my accusations. "Anonymous" commented thusly:
I find it offense and clearly ignorant that you group the whole sda community in your objections

your accusations are false and unfounded to a great extent.

show me proof from the bible or egw that we believe or have the traits that you have mentioned?
I'll leave the poor grammar and punctuation alone for the time being because there are more pressing issues. I must defend my writing! Okie dokie, here we go. On the "hating gays" thing:
Seventh-day Adventists believe that sexual intimacy belongs only within the marital relationship of a man and a woman. This was the design established by God at creation. The Scriptures declare: "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh" (Gen. 2:24, NIV). Throughout Scripture this heterosexual pattern is affirmed. The Bible makes no accommodation for homosexual activity or relationships. Sexual acts outside the circle of a heterosexual marriage are forbidden...For these reasons Adventists are opposed to homosexual practices and relationships. (from here.)
Ooo, a stinging blow from the site of the Seventh Day Adventists themselves! Sucks to be you. Alrighty then? Yes, I thought so. Moving on to the "don't drink" accusation:
The Seventh-day Adventist Church reaffirms its historic stand for the principles of temperance, upholds its policies and programs supporting Article 21 of the Fundamental Beliefs, and calls upon each member to affirm and reveal a life commitment to abstinence from any form of alcohol and tobacco and irresponsible use of drugs. (from here)
Jab and a hook! He's looking tired, Goldie. We good so far? Righty O. Lastly we have to deal with the SDA's alleged belief in "Creationism". Hmmmmm, how about a selection from the SDA's "Affirmation of Creation" page?
Reaffirmation of the church’s Fundamental Belief regarding creation is strongly supported. Seventh-day Adventist belief in a literal and historical six-day creation is theologically sound and consistent with the teaching of the whole Bible...We affirm the historic Seventh-day Adventist understanding of Genesis 1 that life on earth was created in six literal days and is of recent origin...
Any questions, Anonymous? I expect that you either have no idea what your religious organization actually believes or, perhaps, you are just as dumb as a fucking chimp clit. Either way, I expect an apology soon - I will, however, be reading a large science book whilst I wait.

Ok, and could you cretins please use fucking spell-check/grammar-check before you send your goddamn criticism? Is that really asking so much? If Jesus was on your side, HE'D check for you so you wouldn't sound like so much brainless blathering.

I'm going to bed.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Pope to Nuns: You're Not Hateful Enough, So Kill Yourselves

Juuuuust in case you were wondering how that whole "religion = love" thing was coming along, I thought I'd kick you a couple of delicious sausage links to help you sort that shit out. The first is a beautiful tale of the Vatican investigating a group of American nuns for their teachings on homosexuality. You just can't be against the gays enough to satisfy those dress wearing, hypocritical assholes, can you?

I guess if the nuns cause enough of a kerfuffel, you could just kill them. I mean, it's not like it's that uncommon. Seriously, check out what "Father" Daniel said about the visitor-turned-nun he killed being tied and chained to a cross while being denied food and water for days leading - obviously - to her death:
God has performed a miracle for her, finally Irina is delivered from evil...I don't understand why journalists are making such a fuss about this. Exorcism is a common practice in the heart of the Romanian Orthodox church and my methods are not at all unknown to other priests
Ok, that about wraps up the discussion. Any questions can be directed to your instructor and papers are due on the last class day of the month.

Religion makes you crazy!(h/t to both Huffington Post and The Good Atheist)

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Love Your Freedom! Love It!!!

Bradford Campeau-Laurion got ejected from a Yankees game because, get this, he tried to go to the bathroom during the playing of God Bless America. Some officers took exception to Laurion saying that he, "was not concerned with the song" and wrenched his arm behind his back and kicked his ass out.

The United States of America: Where you're free to do anything you want...except what the man decides you shouldn't.

Tuesday, April 07, 2009

Predictable Response

In response to my slapdown of "Dr." Mikio Sankey, someone known only as "anonymous" has left a comment that is worth reposting and having a bit of a go at:
That's so sad. If you've read any (or all) of Mikio's books or tried any of his acupuncture patterns on yourself, you'd know that he's the real thing. I really recommend him to everyone - if you're open to expanding your consciousness. But even people who aren't - he has basic patterns to begin to open patients - and they basically help with stress as well. He's just using simple TCM points learned in every acupuncture school, but he's doing them in a specific order to create sacred geometry patterns (in other words, the treatment will have more of an impact). Whether you call something "Plum pit qi from Liver qi stagnation" (TCM) or "Throat chakra imbalance" (Mikio) you are still treating someone's lump in their throat.
Firstly, we have the old "try it yourself and you'll see it's real" fallacy. This is the woo-believer's favorite tactic because they don't realize that anecdote do not equal data. A person's experience does not, in any way make that experience scientifically valid because no variables were controlled, hence, fabulous parting gifts for you. Enjoy the's the San Francisco treat!

Secondly is the "you're a closed-minded skeptic and should be open to opening your consciousness chakra healing whitelight blahblahblahblah" fallacy. Anyone who has talked to believers has dealt with this particular brand of stupidity. In any event, I'll repost the great video that's been making the rounds of skeptical websites of late, only because it's super relevant to this person's attitude:Ok, now that we've all watched that for the seventh time, let's move on to the, "simple TCM...sacred geometry" bullshit. Traditional Chinese "medicine" is not medicine. Sorry, but it's not. I'd recommend reading parts one and two of Yao Man Chan's Tao of Chinese Medicine over at Skepticblog. He's better at taking apart the silliness and, you know, he's Chinese.

Lastly, I'd like to point out a flaw in the last sentence. "Anonymous" says that, "Whether you call something "Plum pit qi from Liver qi stagnation" (TCM) or "Throat chakra imbalance" (Mikio) you are still treating someone's lump in their throat." Well, no, actually, you're not treating shit if you're doing anything with their "chakra", "meridian line" or "qi" because those things are as make-believe as Gremlins, Chewbacca, or Nic Cage's accent in Captain Corelli's Mandolin. That's like saying you can treat a sinus by massaging the tips of your toes. Oohhh...wait...

So, to sum up: nothing new here, same old same old, thanks for offering up the standard tripe, Anonymous - if that is your real name - and feel free to come back later with more drivel that I can use to make a new post.

Monday, April 06, 2009

"Bromance"? Seriously?

Do we really need a word for dudes who hang out and get along that involves the "-mance" suffix? Jesus, how many episodes of What Not To Wear do you have to watch before "bromance" seems like a good word to use?

When guys meet and hang out, it's hanging out. There's no gayification of that, ok? We shave our faces and maybe trim the chest, we keep the crotchal areal well trimmed and in good shape, but that's just regular old maintenance, not goddamn "manscaping". We use that word as a joke because the queerifaction of our language is amusing to us from time to time.

By the way, if you read this blog at all, you know that I'm all about gay rights. Equality for all. What I'm not down with is the over-compensation like where the Christians who freaked out during the Communist Threat of the Cold War got "...under God" into the U.S. pledge and "In God We Trust" on their money. That shit should have never happened in the same way that "bromance" and "manscaping" and "metrosexual" have no place in straight man talk.

Gay rights? Hell-to-the-yes. "Bromance" - please, just say no to the fagification of English. (Side note: if gay dudes want to call their friendships "bromances", not a prob, fellas...just don't use the term for my friendships. Thanks.)

Rabbi Avi Shafran - Tremendous Douche

Avi...Avi...what are we going to do with you? You write another stupid article, this one "admiring" Bernie Madoff - a scumbag who stole $65 billion dollars. On top of that, you say you don't admire Cpt. Chesley Sullenberger because he didn't grovel and wail that his "saving" was due to your precious and insecure Old Man in the Sky (OMITS).

Do Jews actually pay attention to this jerkoff or is he like the Jewish Pat Robertson? I'm just askin'....

I've taken Avi out to the woodshed before but apparently he just doesn't listen to criticism...or read...or pay attention to life around him in any substantial way. I mean, listen to this helmet-headed reasoning for Madoff's crime not being that major:
Judaism teaches that stealing is a sin, but it doesn’t differentiate between misappropriating a million dollars and pilfering a dime.
Well that means your religion is fucking stupid. If I have $1.40 and then pinch a dime off the counter so I'll be able to buy a large coffee on the way home, I'm pretty sure the secretary at work won't notice that I "stole" it. If I, however, wanted to start my own missile defense company and needed $65 billion dollars and proceeded to take that from my clients, that's a whole other ball of wax. Anyone who can't see that difference needs a CAT scan immediately.

Oh, and I absolutely love this bit:
...Madoff likely began his crime spree in the hope of rewarding, not swindling, investors, and by the time it became clear he would not be able to do that, he already was deeply entangled -- and daily becoming more entangled -- in the web he wove.

None of that, though, is to belittle the great pain Mr. Madoff caused, and is certainly no cause for affording the iniquitous investment broker respect. No, what I admire about him has to do with his owning up to his crime.
"So, yeah, I was trying to make my wife a better woman by showing her how to please me. She wouldn't listen though so I punched her in the face several times. I did cause her pain, to be sure, but I'm sorry. I take full responsibility for my actions. Do you 'admire' me?" What a tool. Here's Avi saying that Madoff stayed in the U.S. because he knew he was going to be caught:
Think about it. The man knew for years that eventually his scheme would come apart and that prosecution loomed, yet he took no steps to flee, huge bribe in hand, to some country lacking extradition treaties.
Does Avi know the meaning of the words "greedy fucking douchebag"? The former CEOs of World Com, Tyco, Enron...these people were greedier than any other people on the planet with the notable exception of Bernie fucking Madoff. Admirable, indeed.

And then Avi says that Sullenberger deserves the hakoras hatov (thanks and appreciation) of those he saved - along with the flight crew - but that's just about enough, thank you, because he didn't give thanks for his excellent and competent training to:
the One Who instilled such astounding abilities in His creations (and Whose help the captain was not quoted as acknowledging)
Talk about a douche. To paraphrase Patton Oswalt, when our bodies return to the loam and the cities are but dust, alien civilizations will know that he was a douchebag. The Neuromancers walking the wastelands will carry high his standard of douchebaggery!

I'm done with this jackass.

(h/t, like he needs the traffic from PZ)

Wednesday, April 01, 2009

Fuck Steve Harvey

Do yourself a favor right now and press "play" on the video below, followed immediately by pause. Let it load so you don't have to suffer through the whole thing. Ok? Ok.

So the gist is that this is an interview with audience questions on the Tyra Banks show and her guest is comedian Steve Harvey. He, for some unknown reason, wants to be the black Dr. Phil now and put out a relationship book. Here, he answers a woman's question about how long to wait until getting intimate with a guy, then he expounds to Banks about what a woman should ask a man when they start going out. Ok, so now hopefully the video is loaded and you can skip to the 5:00 mark. He says he has questions for women to ask. Then at the 6:00 mark he gets to his "question number three - the personal stuff" and he drops this little retarded morsel:
...does he have a relationship wit' God? You sittin' up here talkin' to a dude and he tells you he's an atheist, you need to pack it up and go home. Talkin' to a person don't believe in God, you (inaudible), what's his moral barometer? Where's it at? It's nowhere....
Ok, so you don't even really need to listen to/watch the video because all you need to know is right there. Granted, Harvey isn't any sort of illuminating thinker, but you'd expect someone in the entertainment industry to have met a non-believer that wasn't closeted. I guess that's just the religious prejudice hung out, all pink and naked for everyone to see.

I wonder if anyone would seriously take relationship advice from a three-time-married, sued-by-his-second-wife, I'm-going-to-die-of-not-surprise-he's-a-born-again-christian douchebag? I think he's on the same advice-giving rung of the ladder as the maladjusted elderly virgins of the Catholic church.

Actually, you should watch that one little segment because when he makes the stupid comment, Banks looks a little uncomfortable. There's a weird little laugh she does that says, "Shit, I'm going to get me some letters about that...".

Yes, Tyra, you are.

(h/t to Hemant at the always fantastic Friendly Atheist)