The Lower Quote, As If You Didn't Know, Is By Richard Dawkins, Son.

Thursday, March 31, 2011

Low Hanging Fruit

Yeah, I know the Natural News isn't exactly the best place to be sourcing topics from, but I couldn't ignore this one. See, Adams pimps the idea put forward by "water memory" crank Dr. Masaru Emoto that we should blast our "healing intentions" toward Japan.

Adams says:
In fact, the scientific evidence on this matter is irrefutable: Conscious intention directed toward the healing of a person, a place or even an entire ocean has a real and measurable impact on the chosen recipient.
Um, where might that evidence be? Just askin'.

The next magically awesome quote is from Emoto himself. Check this shit out:
The energy formula of Albert Einstein, E=MC2 really means that Energy = number of people and the square of people's consciousness.
I bet you guys didn't know that the "M" in there stood for the number of people and the "C" is the people's consciousness squared. True story.

And by "true", I mean "not at all true".

Here's Emoto's suggested "prayer":
Please say the following phrase:
"The water of Fukushima Nuclear Plant, we are sorry to make you suffer. Please forgive us. We thank you, and we love you."
I wish we lived in a world where these dummies could try to stop a nuclear meltdown with inane non-solutions like this and the situation wouldn't devolve into a giant, destructive catastrophe. It would be so great to watch them fail on such a huge level.

That said, we can't let that happen and the ingenuity of the Japanese people and the countries that are helping out are being tested as we speak. Let the hippies do their prayers and stay at home, leaving the real work to the scientists and smart people on the ground at the scene.

I wonder how prayers are supposed to absorb neutrons emitted from fuel rods....?

4 Barbaric Yawps:

At 31/3/11 10:57 pm, Blogger clem said...

if it works how do we dispose of the radioactive prayers afterwards? what if they give god radiation sickness? the world could be covered in holy vomit!

 
At 1/4/11 2:13 pm, Blogger ResCogitans said...

in fact there was a study done on this effect, using patients recovering from a particular heart surgery. it found that the 2 groups that were told they were being prayed for (only 1 of which was actually prayed for) did worse than the control groups (one of which was prayed for and 1 not).
the researchers put it down to performance anxiety :)

 
At 5/4/11 3:27 pm, Anonymous The Gear Head Skeptic said...

Jebuz H! Please tell my you're just jerking our chain, Mike. This guy can't be real, can he?
"Dear water, we're sorry and we love you?" What the hell is that?! GHAH!

 
At 5/4/11 4:18 pm, Blogger Heathen Mike said...

Sadly GHS, not jerking at all. Hit that first link up and you'll see for yourself. Brain, meet high-school locker door.

 

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