The Lower Quote, As If You Didn't Know, Is By Richard Dawkins, Son.

Monday, May 13, 2013

800 "Saints" All At Once!

Pope Frank made 800 new saints. That's so many at one time! How can he do that? I thought there were supposed to be miracles associated with the canonization?

Well, I'm glad you pointed that out, because what happened, see, was that 800 Christians were killed (martyred, really) by Ottoman Turks in 1480 (talk about your long time before recognition). What's supposed to happen is there should be two "miracles" attributed to the would-be-saint(s). Normal stuff: curing cancer, stopping the Sun, restoring an amputated limb...pretty standard, really.

As it turns out, all 800 of these folks were killed, "in hatred of the faith", so we can toss out one "miracle" claim, because Jesus. The second is that a nun (who has *NO REASON TO LIE OR MAKE SHIT UP*), who had cancer, according to the Church (who have *NO REASON TO LIE OR MAKE SHIT UP*), was cured after praying to a memorial to the 800 folks. So, that wraps that up, right people?
Implied Facepalm

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3 Barbaric Yawps:

At 14/5/13 12:44 am, Anonymous Woody said...

Isn't it amazing the kind of claims that can be freely made and titles freely given when one can invoke magic!
This includes magic of divine nature. Anything is possible and none will seriously dispute the claim because none dare, its special, its religion, is a little blind faith too much to ask?

PS: Why not 'Saint Woody'. (Just kidding!)

 
At 14/5/13 7:23 am, Blogger Heathen Mike said...

I'd vote for "Saint Woody"!

 
At 14/5/13 3:27 pm, Blogger Zhenya said...

These desperate fucking moves from those vatican clowns will never surprise me.......mother teresa was bad enough (ref: Christopher Hitchens) but.......wtf!

 

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